just to get off of Facebook...

I'm pretty much just on here to get away from everything that's going on. One of my classmates passed away today, from overdosing on drugs. Stuff like this always bothers me down to my core, regardless if I know the person very well or not. I am an extremely empathetic person, and all the pain I'm seeing on Facebook is a bit too much for me because I feel it all. Not only that, but the guy was my best friend from here's first love. I can't imagine what she's going through. I mean yeah, she's married and has a baby girl with someone else, but still. It's just tearing me up thinking about all the pain everyone is going through. He even left behind a baby boy. :( R.I.P. Brett Solley.

Okay, now to get my mind off of that.

My last post was full of positivity and I made myself seem like I was doing AWESOME...but that's totally not true. :/ I went on like a three week splurge that I feel has affected everything! I guess it was a way of venting my frustration of my plateau. but it was dumb and I am DONE. As of today I am just as serious about my weight loss as I was when I began in August. because summer is rolling around....!! and I am not bikini ready, as much as I have lost. :( Last night I put on my bikini that I've had foreverrrr, I mean, I haven't bought a new one since my senior year of high school. I guess I had the mindset that I didn't deserve a new one since I looked like crap in the one I have. lol. but anyway, I put it on and got Nana to take some pictures, so I can have a "before" view. I really wish I would have done that in August, but I hated the way I looked so bad that I just wanted to forget that I ever looked that way. haha. ehh. I also took measurements of my chest, arm, waist, belly, hips, thigh, and calf. because they always say when you work out you lose inches before pounds. and since Kirbi and I are starting this body builder workout schedule, I'm hoping it's going to jump start the rest of my weight loss! I also bought Alli...which I kind of regret now after reading all of the side effects. but...I'll give it a go in a few days, terrified as I am.

but overall, I AM GUNG HO AGAIN. I will reach my goal. :]



I really like this one.